Guilty feelings

I was visiting another blog today and was glad to read that some of the feelings I have been having are not mine alone. These feelings were regarding sharing(or not) the fact that we are adopting from China when asked if(or when)we have children.
I am not ashamed, actually quite proud of the unique opportunity we have been given, but am finding it harder and harder to explain the why, and the when. Especially the when. My standard "probably this time next year" is beginning to make me sound foolish as the wait continues to increase. I am beginning to feel like a fraud.
If things don't speed up soon I too, as one of my fellow bloggers said, will need professional help.

The Newest Batch Of Referrals

Today the CCAA has sent referrals for only six days worth of files. The latest date of referrals is up to November 7,2005. If they keep up with only sending six days per month of referrals we can expect our referral 21 months from this month. This would put us at a date of referral of March of 2009. That will be 3 years since our log in date. That is a far cry from the six months to referral when we signed up. Sometimes I feel like not even looking for the latest set of referrals to come but instead just waiting for the phone call about our groups referrals. Sometimes I think that this would help time go by but in reality I know that it wouldn't. I wish that I could speed things up for Terri. Watching her from month to month go through this emotional torture is almost as bad as watching her from month to month when we were going through the hole fertility issue. I often sit back and wonder why things are the way they are. Why us? God, why us?

New Friend

Hi everyone. Just wanted to tell you about the great new friend I made tonite. Her name is Remi and she was adopted from China by the Juby's from Meaford in March of 2006. She is now two years old and full of energy. She didn't speak to me but all the time I was talking to her Daddy, Mike, she was singing what I am sure was the ABC's. So sweet. Mike shared alot of information that will be helpful when we finally make our trip to China but to tell you the truth I was mesmerized by the singing of a beautiful little girl. Seeing her certainly makes me long for our Ava but seeing Remi tonite makes it so clear that Ava will definitely be worth the wait.
Thanks Mike and Remi for the visit. Hope to see you guys again real soon.