Waiting For Ava

“But these things I plan won’t happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, be patient! For it will surely take place. It will not be late by a single day.” Habakkuk 2:3

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

As If We Were'nt Stressed and Worried Enough

It has been a long wait so far. It just seems to keep getting longer. I am more of a worrier than my wife. This hole time along I have been worried and stressed about the money involved in the adoption. Worried and stressed about travelling to China.Worried and Stressed about finally getting our referral and flying to China to pick up Ava and something is wrong with her. This sometimes happens to people. They either take another child or fly home alone and childless. Now more. It feels like the CCAA just seems to be adding and adding to my pile of things to worry and stress about. My wife and I are registered in the NSN group at China. The Non Special Needs program. We thought long and hard about what we could handle and what we couldn't handle as first time parents. Thus our decision to join the NSN group even though we knew that the wait time for this group was longer than the SN group. The Special Needs group. The SN files get matched faster than the NSN. So here we are. We've been waiting approximately three years and are now two groups away from referrals. We have about another year to wait because China has now only matched 32 days worth of referrals in six months. Plus we have recently found out that the CCAA have been referring SN children or former SN children that have had surgeries to fix their problems to the NSN group. So now we could end up waiting until this time next year which will be approximately four years only to be referred a SN child. If this happens to us I will be very upset and devastated. We could have become parents two years ago had we signed up for the SN program. I can't believe that the CCAA can get away with this. The CCAA have always prided themselves in saying that they do not match the potential parents to the children but instead they match the Child to the potential parents. They say that they do this because this hole procedure isn't suppose to be about the potential parents but about the children. If that's the case then what the HECK are they doing now. How would this be better for the children. Putting SN children in homes that are not prepared to handle all the extra things that would come about because of the Special Needs. As far as I am concerned if the CCAA is doing this then they are no longer thinking about the children.

3 Comments:

  • At 12:26 PM , Blogger Donna Paonessa said...

    Hi Mike - just to be clear, your referral would have to match what is in your homestudy - the CCAA could not refer you a child that has SN's because the Ontario Ministry would not allow it - you have to be Ministry approved to adopt a SN child.

    If you have concerns or questions, please do contact Jenna. *grin*

    Take care,
    Donna

     
  • At 6:51 PM , Blogger The luckiest mommy in the world said...

    Hey guys, long time no talk. We have moved back home to Newfoundland to raise our little monkey and couldn't be happier. It's just so nice to be around family and friends. You should see what goes on down here for China adoptions. It takes between 1 and 2 years to get a social worker, then it takes about 6 months to get into pride and then have to go through Pride. It is only then when they get to finally apply. The stories I have heard are unreal. Chin up Mike. I am not going to say your daughter is waiting for you because that's not what you want to hear right now BUT SHE IS. You'll see. Everybody said that to us and now looking back if things didnt' slow down, we wouldn't have Ms. Monkey. She is the pride and joy of our lives and life couldn't be better. NOBDODY and I mean NOBODY knows what this is like unless they have been through it. Could you imagine if birth parents had to go through all of this......

    Deb

     
  • At 2:01 PM , Blogger The Fabulous Us ! said...

    I like your new look. I come and check up on you becuz I am also an Ontario Mom and a Mom to an Ava. The wait is impossible. I hope that you are getting out and keeping busy. I know there are only so many times you can hear what you hear all the time about the wait. It sucks. It really does. Just know there are people before you and people after you you can lean on for support :) Take care,
    Amy

     

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